A Deep Survey (Thanks Em!)

Can You Spill Your Deep Dark Secrets?

Who is the last person that hurt your feelings? This morning when Eric found out I had the day off he cried because that meant Grandma wasn't coming.

Would you consider plastic surgery? Yes. I have serious plans for a tummy tuck someday.

What is bothering you at this moment? Physically, my feet hurt. Emotionally, worrying about whether I'm a good mother.

Ever started a rumor about someone? No.

Whats the craziest reason why you broke up with someone? I don't know. It takes a lot for me to break up with someone.

Have you ever been accused of cheating on a partner? Yeah.

Ever lied about your age? Maybe when I was younger, to seem older. But I wouldn't lie to seem younger.

Last time you masturbated? It's been a few weeks. Haven't felt the need to.

Ever felt the need to change yourself for someone? Hmm. I've wanted to be a better person, to make the people I care about proud of me, but I don't want to change who I really am.

When is the last time you prayed? When I was a child and still believed such things made a difference.

Do you watch porn? rarely.

Have any of your ex's turned gay? Hmmm. No. I was going to go on a date with someone once who later told me that he was actually gay, and wasn't admitting it to himself yet.

What do you wish you did for a living? Writing books.

What is worse a cheater or a liar? Neither is worse than the other.

Do you still have stuffed animals? Of course! lol

Do you dance around in your underwear? not usually. I dance in the shower though, which might not be wise since I am a klutz.

Do you own a dildo or vibrator? Yep.

Are you a picky person? yes

Do you wish your boobs were bigger? Oh no. My boobs are glorious and I love them just the way they are.

What do you find yourself doing while laying in bed? Sleep mostly. Occasionally TV or a book and...

Ever been skinny dipping? Sadly, no.

How many times have you checked up on your ex? Hmm. I don't check up on him, but I talk to him at least every other day. Mostly about the kids though.

Do you consider yourself trust worthy? I don't know. Mostly yes.

Ever used a fake ID or one that wasn't you? no

How old was your oldest sexual partner? hmmm. Same age as me usually. the biggest age difference was 10 years though.

Have you ever faked an orgasm? What's the point?! If you fake it the guy thinks he doing things right! Unless of course he doesn't care if you have one or not, but it's pointless then too.

If your last ex apologized would you get back with them? no

What family member are you closest to? My brother Shawn.

What does death teach us about life? that it ends at anytime.

If nothing was holding you back, where would you live and why? Hmm. Ireland. In the US, probably just move a lot.

When was the last time you cried? Saturday.

What is the earliest memory you have of a sibling? My earliest memory of Shawn is being a year or two old, and standing in my crib, I had torn my diaper up (again) and Shawn walked in and yelled "Uh-oh Mom! She did it again!" The first of many tattlings.

What is the earliest photograph of yourself that you have that you remember when it was taken? My brother and I on a couch. I was maybe 3. He and I both have our mouths open showing off our gum. My mom sent it to my dad while he was in jail.

How did you meet your first boyfriend or girlfriend? Skate corral!

Describe your typical day, from wake to sleep. Wake up. Drive Alex wherever he needs to be. Make breakfast. Watch TV and play with kids. Make lunch. Go to work. Come home. Late night dinner with Alex, then TV or movie, then sleep.

What would be your ideal birthday present, and why? gift cards or money. Or something that the person picked out that is just perfect for me.

Think of a loved one that you have lost. If you could ask this person one question, what would you ask, and what do you think they would say? I'd have so many questions. Too many to list.

What is the best advice you ever received? That I've spent most of my life doing everything I can to make other people happy, usually causing my own misery, and that it was time for me to start doing things to make me happy.

If you were to die today what would like people to say about you? That I was a great mother, and a caring person.

If you could be anybody, who would you be? myself only thinner and richer!

What is the most important aspect of your life and why? My children. Why wouldn't they be?!

Where would you travel, if you could go anywhere? Ireland first. England. Then all over the US.

What time period you would like to be born in? I like this one. I couldn't live without internet!

If your best friend came to you depressed and upset like you've never seen before, how would you react? I'd do whatever it takes to fix it. Just like she does with me.

Would you be a different person today if you had a different childhood? Yes.

If you could build a car customized just for you, what would it contain? I'd get a Purple Mustang convertible with a black top. (the chauffeur would drive behind me with the kids. LOL)

When have you realized you were really wrong in your judgment about someone? It happens too often.

How do you react when you realize you've made a mistake? I'm way too hard on myself about it.

If you had to sacrifice one of your senses (taste, touch, smell, sight, hearing), which would you choose and why? I couldn't choose. I love to eat, so taste and smell is good. I love my children, so I want to see and hear them, and I am a very touchy feely person. So I can't lose that either.

Who has more power the government or the people? government because all the people let them.

Did I recently have an interesting conversation? Usually I try to have interesting conversations.

Who is the person that I feel has altered the course of my morals and values, and how did they effect me? I have no idea.

What is my earliest or happiest memory? Playing in the snow with my brother.

Which amendment to the constitution is the most important to you and why? I have no idea.

Is speech always free? When and where might it not be free? Hardly ever. lol You never get to say the things you want to say.

When were you the happiest this year? I'm fairly happy right now.

Recall a place, person or event, what emotion do you remember feeling most strongly? The intense love I felt the days my babies were born.

Which friend has had the greatest impact on your life and why? Tammy always tells me when I'm fucking up. I don't always listen, but she's usually right.

Describe your dream house, room by room. Damn that would make this so long. Lots of rooms, lots of yard.

Imagine you are attending your dream concert—what songs would you want to be played? What does the stage look like? Seeing the Cure with me right up front!


If you could learn any new language, which one would you choose and why? Hmm. I don't know.

What are a few qualities you dislike in other people, and why? Dishonesty. Selfcenteredness.

What music makes you want to get up and dance? Why don't you? 80s. I don't because I cannot dance.

How would you spend your time if you were wealthy? Traveling.

What is one of your most personal hopes and dreams? Write a book.

How do others see you? Shy at first. Usually.

What would you do if you had all the money in the world? What would be the point!?

Complete this sentence: Love is… I thought of at least 3 cliche lines to end that with. But I don't know how to really end it. Lets say, often painful, and messy, but very much worth it.

What are you most grateful for? My babies.

Why is your best friend your best friend? Because she knows when I'm bullshitting her and calls me on it. She also keeps me in perspective.

What is a place that inspires you? Somewhere quiet and woodsy.

What is the best decision you have ever made in your life? My choice to be a mommy.

Will You Impress A Person By Fighting Someone to get them to Like You? no

Do You Have demons in your life? ummm? No.

Have You Ever Wanted To Be The Best Person In The World? who wants to be that? Perfection is overrated.

Are You Happy? yes. Right now, I am.

My Job

Not much time for blogging lately I'm afraid. They have me working as many hours as they can without calling me "Full Time" even though I'm getting part time pay and benefits.

This is my 100th blog, but no one ever submitted questions like I asked, so I have none to answer. Thanks to those of you who read my blogs. Are there any of you that have actually read them all?

There are good parts and bad parts about the new job.

Bad parts are: Well the working all the time thing. The other day, a manager made me take out my lip ring. I've worked with 3 managers higher up than her, and non of them made me take it out. Also, I was one of 7 employees walking around with a facial piercing. *I* was the only one told to remove it. I also don't like being away from my children. Today Eric cried because he wanted to go to work with me, and I had to tell him no.

Plus, I miss things.

The other day, I was in the bathroom, getting ready for work, and I heard screams of laughter from the living room. I heard a thunder of feet as the trio ran down the hallway. Josh came running into the bathroom, giggling madly yelling "Willy Wonka farted!"

Today I have been given a group of stuffed animals that I am ordered to take to work with me. I will tell the kids that I carried them around all night. Of course it will be a lie. I will have to leave them in the car.

The good things about my job are, well, the women I work with are all really nice and friendly. Plus the added bonus of people watching.

Well, I have to go make lunch for my kids, and then get ready for work. Thanks for reading.

~Kel

A day in my world

My kids are a constant source of amusement. I say that a lot, but for those of you who know them, you know it is true. I'm not just doing that whole mom blind spot thing where I'm bragging about things that aren't true.

Want some proof? Why not read several snippets from a day in Kelli's world:

Yesterday, somewhat spontaneously, it was decided that a trip to the Zoo was in order for the Sunday activity. We got up fairly early for a Sunday, and had some breakfast before heading out. Now, I always ambitiously set a time I'd like to leave by, and almost always fail miserably at it. I think we left town at 10:30ish. Of course, part of that lateness was due to forgetting the zoo pass at home. But we won't dwell on my forgetfulness, ok? Ok.

So... I have always been fascinated by toddler/preschooler conversations. When one or two or even three toddler/preschoolers have a conversation, the results are usually hilarious. I get to overhear these conversations a lot. But the funniest times are when I hear just a bit of a conversation, and I don't know what came before, or what came after, but what I did hear just throws me. For example. While driving today, I heard the following from my Josh:

"I am freaking out! There was a girl there, and she freaked out on me!"

Now. If any of you know what the hell that's about, feel free to explain in the comments.

We arrived in Indianapolis today, to find that the exit Google Maps wanted us to take was closed. Luckily it was one of those exits that right after it, is an exit to the same street going the opposite direction. So we were quickly back on track, or so we thought...

We quickly encountered a traffic officer. Waving us to turn the way we did not want to turn. I took this in stride, expecting to just turn at the next road, and go back. Oh but NoooooooOOoooOOOoo...

As I was driving, I noticed that every turn going that direction, also had an officer waving people away. Around this time, I noticed a giant, massively huge, long ass line of motorcycles. It was at this moment that I realized that I had been hearing about some huge ride for charity on the radio recently, and decided this was probably it. So I drove up the road, and then got a little lost.

Now, here is another fun Mommy moment:

Frustrated with my inability to cross one MAIN road in Indy (W. Washington for those in the know) and the fact that I was all turned around and lost, the following conversation took place:

Me: (to Alex) Ugh! I don't even know where I am right now!

Alex opened his mouth to respond, when from the back of the van came:

Josh: Hey Alex! (this was yelled)

Alex: (distractedly, because we were trying to figure out what to do next) What Josh?

Josh: Where's my mom at?

Alex: (points at me, still distracted) She's right there.

Josh: Hey Mom! You're right there! That's where you are!

Laughter followed.

We eventually arrived at the zoo. And headed to have lunch. The lunch came with animal crackers, and the kids weren't too hungry. After lunch they decided they didn't want the crackers. Josh gave me his bag to eat, and Eric gave his bag to Alex. I was talking to Eric, shortly after, and offered him a cookie from Josh's bag. Eric just bit the head off, and walked away. It was at this point that Alex looked into the bag of cookies Eric had gifted him, and found that all of them were headless. He had eaten only the heads.

Other amusement came in the form of animal confusion. When we got to the Rhino area, Eric yelled "Look a triceratops!" Josh later pointed at the Ostriches and said he wanted to go see the big chickens. I corrected him and told him what they were. A few minutes later, he was calling them "sausages." Sort of sounds the same, right?

I love my kids!

My next blog is my 100th. So, if you read this, send me as many random questions as you can think of, and I will do my best to answer them all in my next blog!

Thanks for reading!

~Kel